Unexpected Birthday Post

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By the way…

This is not the post I was planning to share today.  But God had other plans for me.

My birthday is tomorrow, June 30.

I am turning 49 years old and am so thankful to be celebrating another year of life.
  For some reason, though,  I often have a hard time on my birthday and being celebrated by my family.  I don’t know why.  It would probably take years of counseling to find out the reason.  (I say that somewhat jokingly…but only somewhat)

  I’m sure my growing up years play a part in my feelings.  Dysfunctional is the best way to describe a large part of my life.  But, I have always tried to be careful to not blame my “todays on my yesterdays”. 


God gave me a wonderful husband and children who think I am a superstar.  My children truly celebrate me everyday.  I feel that with my whole heart.  They are my biggest cheerleaders in all that I do.  They believe in me!  So does my husband.

So does my mom!

It’s not a worry about pleasing others and needing acceptance and applause kind of thing.   It’s just maybe an “am I worth it” sort of thing. 

Now, understand me…I know in my heart of hearts that I am worth it.  I am worth it because of who I am in Christ.  I know all of that.  I really do.  Remember that it’s something that I really don’t understand myself.

And then this morning, the day before my birthday, I woke up with a small dread in my  heart of what the next day was.  It truly has nothing to do with age.  It has to do with the thought of being celebrated.  It has to do with expectation.  I really cannot explain it.

Man, you really didn’t come here for all of this, did you?  So sorry.  I’m truly just trying to follow the leading of the Holy Spirit in what I’m sharing. 

Stick with me and please come back for another post that’s not so “deep'” and “weighty”.

So back to waking up and feeling that dread of celebration…

The reason I brought that part up is another  BUT THEN…GOD moment…

I woke up praying for God to give me a different heart.  To help me go into the day and the occasion with a different mind set.

Immediately, I checked a message from a sweet friend whom I have only known a short time and it read this…

“Good morning Amy!  I wanted to wish you a one day early Happy birthday!  You are a wonderful reason to celebrate!  I treasure your friendship sweet lady and join those who love you most in celebrating all that God has in store for you not only tomorrow on your special day, but in the days, months, and years ahead.” 

Guys!  Do you know what I call that?

  I call it a love letter from God.  Yes, it was a special note from a friend, but mostly a love letter from God.  It’s something that makes me look up to God and say, “I love you too, God”.  Because, in essence, what happened was God sent me that note to tell me He loved me and He knew what was in my heart. 

He cares!  He gets me!  He knew what I needed!

He is so on time!!

Now please listen.  I am not saying any of this for you to feel sorry for me or to try and diagnose me.

I have a wonderful life with a wonderful husband and precious children.  I am blessed beyond measure. 

I am sharing this mainly because I wanted to share what God did for me this morning.  He spoke to me through my friend.  He validated me when I needed it.  He reminds me daily how much He loves me and how “worth it” I truly am.

My friends, that’s how He feels about each one of us.  Not just me.  He wants us to realize our worth in Him.  He wants us to know how much He loves us and that we are the apples of His eye. 
He sent His son for each one of us.  We are worth it!

We are worth being celebrated by those who love and care about us. 

I am worth being celebrated by my family and friends and I am going to try my hardest and receive that celebration.

Maybe you could pray that I receive it as Jesus intends for me to receive it.  Thanks!

So..happy birthday to me, Amy Beth Kinser, child of the King!

I promise that my next post will be on something a bit “prettier”. 

*****Make sure to look for love letters from God.  I promise He sends them!